THE PANTS

I knew that, at some point, this would happen. Someone would say something mean to one of my children and I would want to strangle them. I just wasn't planning on it happening so soon. Tonight I was helping Olivia get things lined out for school and she was complaining that she didn't have any pants to wear. I informed her that there were two pairs in her drawer. She quickly told me she didn't like them anymore, even though one pair she received for Christmas and loved them and the other she had chosen herself at the store. Hmmm.... It didn't take long to get to the bottom of this mystery: a girl at school had commented that she "didn't like those pants" so Olivia was never going to wear either pair of pants ever again. Her eyes immediately welled with tears as she spoke, my heart broke with sadness and anger, and into my room we went for "the talk." She sat on my lap and we talked about how special she is and how much I love her. We talked about how much she loves to put outfits together and how cute she always looks. We talked about the time when,in sixth grade, my friend crushed me by saying my new shoes were ugly.We talked about how boring and not fun the world would be if everyone wore the exact same clothes. And then we talked about true friends and how true friends treat each other. She cried and nodded as I talked, and I hope she got it. That it's okay to be Olivia, to do and say and be and look however she wants to. And that as long as she is happy with herself, that is all that really matters. We hugged and she wrapped her arms around my neck and said, "Thanks, mom." Oh, the agony! Why is this happening already?! This talk was a hard one. It's easy for me to say "Who cares what so-and-so thinks of your pin-striped kaki's....they are darling!" but I am now the mom who remembers (all too well) how much the opinions of my friends meant to me in my younger years. I know this is only the first of many friend and peer pressure issues with which we will have to deal. I can only hope that: 1)Olivia will remember how strong and kind and beautiful she is long enough to get through the next few years and 2)that the sassy brat who made fun of her gets run over on the way home from school...